A little Montana humor

Newbie Age : Join date : 2008-12-31 Posts : 9 Location :

I have no idea if this is actually from Foxworthy or not but some of these just had me laughing because they are so true!

Jeff Foxworthy's Comments on Montana:

If 'vacation' to you means going shopping for the weekend in Great Falls , Billings or Bozeman (while the kids swim at the Comfort Inn), You might live in Montana .

If parking your car for the night involves an extension cord,You might live in Montana .

If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 8 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by,
You might live in Montana .

If you're proud that your state makes the national news primarily because it houses the coldest spot in the nation,You might live in Montana .

If you have ever refused to buy something because it's 'too spendy', You might live in Montana .

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, You might live in Montana .

If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, You might live in Montana .

If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, You might live in Montana .

If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time, You might live in Montana .

If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, You might live in Montana .

If you know how to correctly pronounce Butte , You might live in Montana .

If you measure distance in hours, You might live in Montana .

If your family vehicle is a crew cab pickup, You might live in Montana .

If you know several people who have hit deer more than once, you might live in Montana .

If you often switch from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day and back again, You might live in Montana .

If you can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching, You might live in Montana .

If you see people wearing hunting clothes at social events, you might live in Montana .

If you've installed security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked, You might live in Montana .

If the largest traffic jam in your town centers around a high school basketball game, You might live in Montana .

If you carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them, You might live in Montana .

If there are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at Wal-Mart at any given time, You might live in Montana .

If there are more people at work on Christmas Eve Day than on Opening Deer Rifle Season, You might live in Montana .

If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, You might live in Montana .

If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, You might live in Montana .

If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction, You might live in Montana .

If you can identify a southern or eastern accent, You might live in Montana .

If you consider Red Lodge exotic, You might live in Montana .

If your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your cottonwood, You might live in Montana .

If the sunbelt to you means Miles City , You might live in Montana .

If a brat is something you eat, You might live in Montana .

If finding your misplaced car keys involves looking in the ignition, You might live in Montana .

If you find 0 degrees a little chilly, You might live in Montana .

If you actually understand these observations, You Must Live In Montana !